Deeper Than the Surface

I’m noticing today that my intimacy with God hasn’t been as deep in the last few weeks & of course I want this to change. So I’m thinking back about what’s been going on in my life that could be contributing to this malaise. I certainly acknowledge that there’s the normal ebb & flow that happens in any relationship. In my walk with God, however, I want to pay attention really well so I don’t settle for shallow when I can have deep, intimate & flourishing. The recent things in my life that I’m observing include some of the ongoing challenges with the concussion recovery – sleep challenges, energy & focus struggles. I’ve also noticed that there have been some insecurity flare ups that have definitely sidetracked me some. There’s also the challenges of schedule changes with my kids being out of school. 
None of these things can break my relationship with God, but they can certainly distract my focus & reliance so that I don’t live in the deeps with God. So I’m leaning into God & asking for more Heavenly Help. I’m also endeavoring to listen & pay attention better. I’m also keen to be less independent & more reliant on the Holy Spirit. Anyone want to join me? 

Do a Good Job

Having my kids home for summer break is wonderful & challenging. I certainly enjoy their company & they have super fun personalities. As their mom, I’m also responsible to help them grow into healthy, responsible & productive adults – or at least encourage their decisions to move in those directions. 

Funny thing about this parenting gig: seems like heaps of what I tell them needs to flourish in my life as well. I find that my parental coaching has lots of application in my life & maybe this whole parenting thing is God’s parental efficiency plan. I most certainly don’t want to parent from a place of hypocrisy so I’m pushing myself to do well & live up to the stuff that I want to see my kids exhibit 🙂

changing seasons

It seems like most of America is going through the seasonal change from Spring & moving into Summer – often one of the more popular seasonal transitions 🙂 My family & I are looking forward to the long & hot days of Summer, playing in water features at various parks, taking walks in the cool of late evenings, the crisp morning greetings and doing all of the sun burn avoidance rigors.
As I think about changes of seasons, it seems to me that life is full of such changes. We go from the season of being school for 12+ years to having a full time job. We go from being single to being married or back to being single. We go from having no kids to being responsible for someone who we love more than we eve thought we possibly could.
Seasons change – and they did for Jesus as well. He changed from being a carpenter to being an “informal” Jewish teacher with thousands of fans. Jesus went from being full blown popular to being one of Jerusalem’s most hated convicts in less than 7 days.
Seasons change & it seems to me that we grow the most as humans during the changing seasons rather than the static seasons 🙂
Have a weekend filled with joy, peace & grace 🙂

frail

This has been an interesting winter & I’m getting to notice things that I’ve not seen or felt before:

  • nests in trees that were covered by leaves in the summer,
  • branches of trees that reveal designs of strength & creativity with refreshing beauty,
  • birds who sing with unmuffled strength and much more. 

I’m noticing that winter reveals a weakness and frailty that I often don’t perceive during the summer, vulnerable exposure.  Maybe sometimes God leads us into winter seasons in our lives to increase our intimacy with God – exposing our vulnerable frailty so we can be all the more closer to God’s strength, truth and presence.  Winter reveals what summer conceals 🙂

summer is in full SWING

What a totally crazy couple of weeks!!  Too crazy to describe – too many whirling (not spinning) plates!!!

The big BUT in all of this busy-ness is some really rich & sweet fellowship.  I’m finding this to cause my head to tilt at present because my previous experiences have been then when i get insanely busy it seems that my interactions w God get lost in the whirlwind dust somewhere.  BUT, these last few weeks have been different – i’ve had a richness & sweetness w God that’s continued below the surface frenzy.  its been most interesting to still sense some very deep & rich fellowship w God in the midst of seriously crazy schedules, demands, etc.  What this says to me is that God is pretty intent about having a relationship w us.  On the human side & being dreadfully honest, i’ve also been in a really needy state of being – needing God in all the stratas of life where i interact.  maybe i’m getting over any personal dignity & accepting that at ground zero, i’m a needy person, even if that puts me in the pariah category. 

i just need God, plain & simple – whether i’m busy or bored, popular or pariah, floundering or fulfilled – i just need God