How to Improve

I have a child who is in the process of a vertical learning curve related to blame or responsibility. This is a nice way to say that blaming other people facilitates irresponsibility & this is no bueno.
These conversations challenge me to look at areas in my life where I might be blaming people & not taking responsibility for my actions, words & attitudes.
I’m seeing with stark clarity that the attempts to blame others limits my ability to grow & improve.
Are there places in your life where you seem quagmired? Is it possible that you might need to think about being proactive & taking responsibility for the things you can change?
Let’s be sure that we let the Holy Spirit speak truth into our hearts so that we don’t deceive ourselves, limiting how much we grow & improve.

when I make mistakes

 My husband was recently upset with me for not communicating with him about something that is extremely important.  He called me and I quickly knew that he was displeased with me about something.  Thankfully, when my husband gets upset about something, he usually does a good job about maintaining constructive communication to resolve the issue rather than ranting and raving or taking cheap shots on peripheral topics.  When he explained the problem, I was clearly at fault.

There was another issue this week where I had been responsible to take some notes and had made some mistakes in my note taking.  My gracious friends helped point out some of these mistakes and they were very kind and gentle with their help.

In both of these situations, I totally owned up to my shortcomings.  I didn’t deflect my mistake, blame someone else or have an emotional reaction.  In both situations, I explained that there was no one to blame but me, that I had definitely messed up and I apologized.  I made an internal decision to try to do better in the future for these areas.  I didn’t ingest any bitterness, animosity, resentment or other negative emotional baggage.  When we get corrected, let’s own our mistake, get better and appreciate the feedback 🙂

credit downgrade

 Everyone has been pretty uptight about the credit downgrade from S&P for the US and this is undoubtably a really big deal.  It seems to me that credit & blame sometimes go in the same playing field – credit when it goes well & blame when something fails.

So here are some interesting thoughts / questions:

  • how often do we take the credit for God’s work in our lives?
  • do our talents & hard work get more applause than God’s hand working in & through us?
  • do we blame God for the failures & shortcomings in our lives?
  • is taking credit for God’s work in our best interests?
  • is the blame game merely the deflection of responsibility or does it have any value?
Paul said that God’s grace was very effective in his life – credit given where credit is due.  Seems like a healthy strategy 🙂