3 Tips for Awkward

Life can throw lots of awkward & unexpected things at us. Sometimes, we get a random phone call / text that is prickly. Or someone sends us a text that’s cryptic / unclear & easy to misunderstand. Or a co-worker / fellow student says something insensitive or stupid. It’s easy on these occasions to be reactive & do or say something we later regret. 

So here are a few tips for awkward:

  1. Pause – I usually wish I could retract my quick retorts.
  2. Pray – a quiet &  quick “HELP!!!!” is always a good instinct.
  3. Preview – think about what you say, before you say it, to preview the possible responses / outcomes. 

Happy navigating!

Important Parts

Who knew that a metatarsal was so important?!?!!!  For that matter, who even knows what a metatarsal is???

And this is exactly my point. If you’ve ever broken your toe, you’ll know that a metatarsal (toe bone) is super important & helpful for ambulatory ease ,)

Translation: if you want to walk without pain, don’t break your toe!

The same principle holds true in the Body of Christ. Every person is important & plays a vital role, regardless of how visible or invisible they may be. So let’s not compare ourselves to one another because we each play a unique & essential role. Some of us are spleens, eardrums, corneas, colons & clavicles. If you’re a neuron, you’re every bit as vital as a duodenum, albeit entirely different. 

Let’s never belittle nor minimize our place or the role others play throughout the Body of Christ!  You’re essential!!

The Best Multi-Tool

Have you seen those gadgets that look like big pocket knives, but they have various configurations of tools?  Depending on the size of the tool, these contraptions can have screwdrivers, miniature hammers, awls, scissors, files, corkscrews & stuff that is totally baffling to me.  Since I’m not into keeping tools easily accessible, I don’t carry around this kind of thing, although I admit it could be useful.

With this idea, let’s consider that genuine love is the multi-tool perfectly suited for our relationships, regardless of the depth, length or intensity of the relationship.  Here are some of the specific applications that we can use everyday with genuine love as our relationship multi-tool:

  • patience, endurance, stability, faithfulness – these come in handy when you’d rather jet or quit
  • forgiveness, always hoping, believing the best – these are useful for those sharp exchanges & misunderstandings that happen from time to time
  • kind, encouraging, celebrating truth – great tools to build up the other person without being fake
  • selfless, generous – super helpful when we need to go the extra mile
  • celebrating righteousness & being protective – keeping a relationship clean & clear from fleshly clutter is essential to maintaining healthy interactions

Be sure to keep genuine love as your top priority in your relationships!

Upset the Apple Cart

Whenever I travel to Africa, I’m reminded about the benefits of stability for the sake of progress. At the same time, let’s be careful not to get so comfortable with stability & equilibrium such that we stop growing. 

Jesus often upset the Apple cart / status quo. He literally overturned the money changers tables in the temple. He defied the religious leaders of His day. He loved with an extravagance that was unnerving to many observers. 

Here are some ideas to consider that you could consider personally with Apple cart upsetting:

  • Pursue Spiritual Gifts to be integrated into your daily living.
  • Love when its inconvenient.
  • Consider being generous with words / finances that isn’t within your normal scheme. 

To Be Known

“ . . . . just as also I have been fully known.”  1 Cor 13:12

When I think about who I am & who I present myself to be, I want to think that there’s no discrepancy. But sometimes there is. It’s not uncommon for us to be in a situation & moderate ourselves to be situation appropriate. There’s some wisdom with these kinds of choices. 

But I appreciate that we Jesus / Genuine Love, there’s no need to modify or regulate who we are. Indeed, no one knows us better than Jesus & being anything less than fully transparent w Him is a tragic distortion of intimacy. And even worse, we miss experiencing genuine love. And in full truth, we are made for genuine love – to be loved & fully known, as well as knowing & fully loving Jesus. 

Happy Father’s Day weekend!

What Do You Want?

“If I’m smart, I’ll be important.”  When I was growing up, I used to think this. Consequently, I thought that college degrees where the golden ticket to being valuable & respected. And then I met some college professors who were nothing short of thoroughly brilliant, but didn’t have much voice nor impact. 

Sometimes, I don’t think we stop to think about what we want & when we get our desires, we can be disappointed or unfulfilled. For this reason, we would be wise to pray that God would direct our desires & Help is to walk in truth. Such praying can help us to not pursue futile goals nor disappointing outcomes!

Ugly or Beauty?

I’m presently riding through what seems to be a desert in Arizona, disappointed that there’s no In-n-Out burger stand anywhere on the horizon. It looks barren & desolate with little tufts of gray foliage scraggling it’s way on the endless sand, to the end of the horizon. 

For some folk, this vista is austere beauty in perfection. For others, the seeming absence of life & vacancy is nothing but unattractive. 

And I’m grateful that God has made not only this austere beauty along with rainforests & snowcapped mountains. Equally true is that God has made you beautiful & you’re highly desirable to Him, regardless of how your look, your talents or inadequacies, etc. You are never ugly nor repulsive to God!!

Not My Flavor

 I recently watched the NBA championship series between the Cavaliers & Warriors. Both teams have very different styles & it’s easy to find strong proponents for each style. There are heaps of folk who rightfully admire LeBron James, for the Cavs & heaps of folk who like the point spread among several players for the Warriors. 

Personally, I tend to admire the teamwork style of play over more of the superstar style.  With that said, I’ve been thinking about my distaste for styles that are different than my preference. And I’ve come to this conclusion: God has made each of us in unique & wonderful ways. Some individuals are wired up for massive individual achievements & some are wired up for the team approach. Being hostile & acrimonious against styles we don’t like can show not just a bias but also the refusal to grow & respect others who are different than ourselves. 

With this line of thinking, I would suggest that Paul is a phenomenal NT example of a massively high achiever, who valued Help along his various journeys. Maybe Barnabas would be an example of a team player, looking to include as many teammates as he possibly could throughout his life. Both men had unique gifts, contributions & value to add to God’s kingdom. Let’s be careful to respect others who have different giftings rather than belittle & deride them for not being like us 🙂

Traveling Tips

This week, I have a lot of traveling & I would suggest that these tips below can also be helpful throughout our journey in life:

  • Less is more:  I don’t need as much as I think & I don’t like carrying unnecessary things.
  • Security for safety:  human security is never as powerful as divine security.
  • Flexible keeps things fun:  hold lightly to your plans.
  • Wonderful people watching:  consider that God enjoys watching us because God is Love!

You Do You

This is a common phrase that I hear  when someone wants to acknowledge a difference & not be excessively hostile. In general, I like the premise of this phrase, but it unravels quickly when the other person oversteps their personhood & begins trampling on you. 

For example, even though Joseph had expressed clear limits to Potiphar’s wife, she exceeded his boundary & tried to force him to have sex with her. This turned out bad for Joseph, even though he did the right thing. While we may try to be respectful & do the right thing, not everyone follows those same convictions. And if things go south for you, like they did for Joseph, you can rest assured that God works everything to our good, as we keep loving God & stay true to His purposes. Just some food for thought for your wonderful weekend 🙂

Doing Difficult

As I parent my own teenagers, I am increasingly recognizing the boatloads of magnificent stuff my parents invested in me when I was growing up & I’m massively grateful!  Much of my appreciation for the Bible, beauty & creativity, as well as Holy Spirit can largely be attributed to my parents & their influence on me.  Additionally, my parents taught me heaps about doing what’s difficult, rather than shying away.

Do you have difficult things in your life?  Difficult things can include:  internal mindsets, challenging work situations, relationships, school classes, bad habits, etc.  Here are some verses that you could pray to help you do what’s difficult:

  • Phil 4:13, I can do all things through Christ who strengths me
  • 1John 4:4, Greater is He Who is in you than he that is in the world
  • 2Cor 2:14, God leads us into triumph
  • Rom 5:5, God’s love is poured into your heart through the Holy Spirit
  • James 1:5, Ask God for wisdom & He’ll give it to you liberally

Feel free to send this to anyone you know who could be struggling to do difficult things!

Useful Obstacles

I don’t like things that slow me down – cars, lines, crowds, etc.  So when things get in my way, I instinctually lock into the persist & overcome mindset.  For example, when a car in front of me drives slowly, I look for ways to get around the car. Sometimes, this backfires because my speeding up can position me to get a traffic ticket, which is worse than having to drive slower. 

With this thinking, we would be wise to not entirely dismiss things that are obstacles. We see this principle in the Bible in relation to Joseph getting thrown into a pit & prison. Clearly, these challenges weren’t pleasant & I’d wager that Joseph was looking for a shortcut or way to circumvent these obstacles. In hindsight, however, the obstacles & hindrances were very useful to his end destination. And there’s a good chance that the same could be true for us. The obstacles in our lives become instruments in God’s hands 🙂

Hurry Scurry

Summer has started in full swing so that means a big shift for me w the day to day schedule & my kids being done with school. So I feel like I’m in the middle of a hurry scurry season, running everywhere & trying to help my kids have an enjoyable & productive Summer. 

I think we all go through seasons in life where we are very busy & some not as much. No matter what the season of our life, let’s stay attentive to Jesus’ presence in our lives. Let’s stay steady with our daily prayer & Bible time to keep our hearts stable regardless of the season 🙂

Helpful Tips for Learning

My three teenage kids have learning curves with lots of stuff, as do I.  And part of what means to be human is learning. I think that it’s good to always be learning because this helps us to continually grow. So here are some helpful ideas for daily learning:

  • No shame – don’t belittle yourself or others for what is not known or the lack of proficiency.
  • Celebrate progress – don’t let “perfect” sabotage progress.
  • Learning differences – everyone learns in unique ways.
  • Committed to learn – may there never be a day when we don’t learn
  • Be gentle – we learn better with grace rather than harsh 🙂

Happy Friday to you!

Be Contagious

Recently, my kids picked up a congestion bug and they’ve been hacking  along the phlegm spectrum.  This started with one of my boys and the other two caught this bug.  In the last several days, I have felt some of these symptoms trying to creep into my breathing, so I’ve been vigilante to take extra vitamins and drink more water.

Usually, we don’t think of things that are contagious in very positive ways.  We don’t want to “catch” the cold, flu, yellow fever, etc.  But let’s also consider that sometimes, we can also “catch” another person’s insecurity, fear, arrogance and other such distasteful traits.  Instead, let’s make intentional decisions to be gracious, patient, compassionate, gentle, truthful (Fruits of the Spirit) and just maybe other people will “catch” some healthy traits for our communications and relationships!  Let’s allow Holy Spirit to work life and health into our souls so that we are contagions of genuine love!

Death Stinks

I found dead baby rabbits in our basement & it was disturbing. They found a hole under our front porch to burrow down & squeeze into our basement. So when I was changing the furnace filter, I found their decaying bodies much to my shock. I was really unnerved with finding them, so I made my boys use a snow shovel to scoop their bodies into the garage trash. Yesterday, I made the executive decision to keep the garage trash on the driveway outside, because the decomposing carcasses are beyond odious. 

Death stinks – full stop. Paul tells us in Romans 8 that the mind set on the flesh is death & a fleshly mindset is very noxious. So consider where there might be some smelly areas in your life because these areas might be rotting from fleshly thinking. Fumes like insecurity, pride, fear, deception, isolation, manipulation, blame, etc smell bad because they’re rooted in a mind set on the flesh. Let’s be committed to cultivating a mind set on Holy Spirit, so we can smell like life & peace!

What Is Success?

It’s interesting to scroll through various social media platforms & look at the abundant advice about how to be successful. When I read through some of this advice, I always walk away asking, “What is success?”  

Is success:

  • living a comfortable life, without conflict or drama? 
  • having heaps of money, recognition, achievements or a glam image? 
  • living a balanced life, all things regulated & controlled for maximum mediocrity?

What is success?  In Jeremiah 9:23-24 it says,  “Let not a wise man boast of his wisdom, and let not the mighty man boast of his might, let not a rich man boast of his riches;  24 but let him who boasts boast of this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the Lord who exercises lovingkindness, justice and righteousness on earth; for I delight in these things,” declares the Lord.”

So maybe the most simple definition of biblical success is knowing & loving God, as well as loving our neighbor & ourselves.  Have an awesome Memorial Day weekend living successfully!

Good for the Soul

This morning I tried a new breakfast: quinoa, almonds, blueberries & maple syrup. It was ok for my first attempt & I know it’s better for me than bacon & a cheese omelette  so you m endeavoring to make healthy decisions. 

The same can be said for decisions we make about our souls. Here are a few decisions that are good for the soul:

  • Forgiveness:  keeps the grudge venom neutralized
  • Encouragement:  keeps us with positive thoughts about people
  • Gratitude: keeps us looking for good
  • Trust: keeps us actively declining worry & leaning on God

Keep making healthy choice for your body & soul!

LET’S GO!!!

It’s a rare occassion when I’m waiting for an appointment or for a reply from someone because I’m usually late, ill-prepared, running behind or I’ve just plain forgotten something on my schedule.  So when it happens that I’m on time & fully prepared, waiting for an appointment or a person, it feels weird.

Which makes me wonder about God’s plans and daily participation in my life.  I appreciate that we are each uniquely made, so some of you reading this don’t relate to such disorganization & others of you feel simpatico with me.  And thinking about God structuring our days, organizing our schedule and quilting together times, people and experiencing, can be a really helpful mindset.  Indeed, when I try to run my life & plan my days, things get messy.  So I’m grateful that God organizes each day for knowing God better!